I stole Peter White’s sandwich

OK, it’s been over 10 years now but I feel it’s about time I confessed.  For those of  you who are not familiar with the name Peter White, let me explain by this LINK to the BBC profile of Peter.

 

 

 

 

Peter White

Also, for those who may not already know , Peter is blind, a great broadcaster and sadly, a failed comedian! However, I like to listen to him and always enjoy his wit and humour despite his comedy act for the BBC once!"

Now, the sandwich.  I still shudder inwardly at the shame of what I did all those years ago but perhaps by telling this story I can gain some forgiveness or perhaps… no, I think I will have to wait and see.

I was on a train travelling from West Byfleet (I think) to London.  I had left the office in a hurry and had missed my lunch and being both very thirsty and even hungrier I decided to risk the offerings being pushed along the train by the rather disinterested South West Trains employee. 

Along he came with his cart laden with fizzy drinks, sweets and biscuits and ONE cheese sandwich. In fact only ONE sandwich in total and I was going going to have it at any cost.  I stood up from my seat and followed the trolley and was surprised to recognise a voice coming from the seat ahead of me.  yes, it was Peter White with his guide dog.  “Have you got any sandwiches” he asked just as I was surreptitiously removing the one and only sandwich from the trolley while the vendor was distracted by both Peter and his dog.  “yes, I have one cheese sandwich left sir” said the hapless vendor who turned to retrieve the cheese sandwich. 

He at first looked confused as he searched the empty space where the sandwich has nestled and then slowly looked up at me to see that I was holding the precious item in my hands, close to my chest with a look that said “it’s mine, all mine"”!!  The look on his face said, more of less “selfish thieving bastard” but I was unabashed as at this time my hunger had turned me into a potential mad axe man and there seemed no likelihood that I would have the grace to hand it over to be sold to Peter White.

With a withering look the vendor advised the no doubt hungry Peter White that he was, sorry but the sandwich “had gone” to which Peter replied “oh, I’ll have a mars bar then please”.  And with Peter facing me behind the sandwich vendor, I duly paid for the sandwich while the attendant continued to glare at me and saying loudly, “the cheese sandwich Sir, that will be £2.50 please”!  

Named and shamed? No sadly not as I slid off back to my seat and devoured the vile concoction of overly mature cheddar, stale bread and dry salad.  The worst sandwich I had ever eaten.

I suppose I did spare poor Peter White the ordeal of eating the offending thing I suppose.  But I still cringe at what I had done every time I hear his cheerful voice on the radio.  It was a shameful thing to do given that he could not see me while the attendant had his back to me but I was in the full view of Peter who was facing me as I literally took the sandwich from under his nose.

So ten years on, Peter White, I humbly apologise for my despicable and reprehensible act of selfishness and promise that if I ever see you again I will identify myself to you and, if you wish, give you new but much fresher cheese sandwich!