“Mine’s Bigger Than Yours”

 

Who would have thought that grown men would be saying this to other grown men, in public, out loud and without any embarrassment in 20th century Britain.  Well, sad to say, many did and I was probably one of them.  Don’t panic, I wasn’t talking manhood or any similar thing that may get confused with the real subject matter of this otherwise strange declaration of virility.  No, these men (and me) were talking ……….. technology!

Of course, we were talking phones (mobiles if you are British or Cell phones if you are unlucky enough to be American – only joking!) and laptops and hand held PC’s or the long dead PDA’s, remember them?

I strived, or was strove, to obtain a mobile phone that I was able to pop in my pocket and never see or feel again until it buzzed or sounded off like a klaxon and then was so small I wasn’t able to find it.  I had a Micro PC from Toshiba that was the same size as my other fashionable item, my Filofax!  They still sell these “analogue” (as I once heard some loon of a teen describe one) in their thousands, so writing with a pen or pencil is NOT dead! Nor is dependency on a normal journal or diary to make sure you remember to go to the dentist or your life saving therapy at the local NHS Hospital (Americans, this is a National Health Service hospital where you get FREE treatment in the UK…. yaboo sucks to you then!).

So here we are decades on from when a computer occupied a whole building, if not several buildings, to then a room, then a desk or just under it to one you can now hold in your hand and is also a phone, a camera, an internet browser ( I will not insult anyone, except perhaps the American readers by explaining what that is … sorry, still joking) and, wait for it…. a Diary!!!  Mind you there are now so many functions available it’s a surprise to me it doesn't wipe my backside for me!  Above all, they fill your hand, your pocket and your whole life now, they are so large. 

These days, what do I have?  I have a medium sized simple  touch screen, yes a touchy feely phone and I do little with it other than make the occasional call. It is already redundant.

Yes, the 21st Century, phones, iPads and E Readers are all going large.  Forget mine’s smaller than yours fella!  I have a BIG ONE and boy don’t you forget it is now the cry from the public bar of the nearest pub. 

What will be the next step in evolution?  I leave that thought for whoever reads this.