Have you ever been standing in a shop, in a queue or for my American readers, a line, waiting your turn to part with your well earned cash when you hear those fateful words. Are you ready for this?
"Can I 'elp?"
This call is usually delivered in a kind of bored, couldn't care less, dullard tone that makes me want to scream "yes you can you dolt but only if you say expleteive deleted please" Yes, that one word would make the world of difference. It would stop this expletive bursting from me for a start and it would sound to me, even if it were not true, that the person calling out to me actually did want to help me part with my money. Alas, they don't actually care and to demonstrate so that use the absolute minimum of words to illustrate their disinterest.
It happens in almost every kind of place where "Service" is to be offered, shops, the post office, local governement offices and even the police, who don't even utter a single "hello, hello, hello " these days either.
The missing word, no doubt as illiusive as "the missing link" is, yes you have guessed it.... is
P L E A S E
Comments please, but not to me. No, next time you hear the shout "can I 'elp" just shout out
"please"! Then when collecting your purchase again repeat the word, Pleaseeee. Perhaps then the sales person will get the message.
Can I help you?
May I help?
Next please?
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