Cyclists Again!

It goes without saying what my views are on cyclists who use the pavements as I have made those views very publicly in my blogs.  Living as we do here in Sussex we often see well known personalities, mainly those appearing in theatre, who are for one reason or another visiting our city. 

Today, while taking our usual “yomp” into town we were confronted by Jeremy Paxman!  Yes, he of the TV.  He who famously asked Michael Howard the same question 14 times! He of the often razor like put down! Yes, the man himself, on a bike….. a bike…. I still can’t quite believe it.  Sadly, Mr Paxman was riding on the pavement and sadder still he was heading directly towards us and showed now sign of giving way to us mere mortal pedestrians from such a rural or provincial town such as ours.  We were peasants no doubt, blocking his path, standing in his way.

He cycled past us as if we didn’t exist, brushing so close to me that I could swear I smelt his cologne.  Not a word to say, excuse me, sorry or whatever platitude he could offer that would compensate for my having to step sharply aside from his frantic pedalling.

Mr Paxman, pavements are for people, roads are for cyclists!

Next time on Newsnight or University Challenge please try to remember that ordinary mortals always remember famous faces, especially when they are rude and inconsiderate. 

PS: Why were you not wearing a safety helmet, reflective vest and goggles for your epic cycle ride around Chichester?

For more on Mr Paxman and Cycling please click here

Why so Precious?

A broadcaster questions and challenges a local government representative about food in schools and, quite rightly some may say, accuses the said official of being a “food fascist”.  Now, the broadcaster has not called the official a Nazi or of being a member of a fascist political party. No he has simply equated a dictatorial approach to giving dietary advice as being some what “fascist”. Oh heavens above and hand wringing terrible of this blunt speaking broadcaster to have called a policy of a single individual “fascist”.  The outpouring of outrage and accusations fly about with threats of legal action (and no doubt the hope of a nice little windfall from the case) and gasps of horror about one little word.

These days it seems impossible to not be accused of some sort of “ism” or “ist”, be it “fatist”, “hightist” or whatever other invented word that is really meant to mean, prejudice.  However, I have to exclude from this the true “isms” of Racism and fascism which are truly unwanted and detestable “ism’s” of the worst types. 

Recently I dared to write in my local paper about the cyclists who ignore all sanity, riding in and out of shoppers in the pedestrian precinct and generally terrorising anyone who gets in their way.   In my minor rant I dared to use the expression about this irresponsible group of cyclists when I referred to them as “cycling fascists” . Oh oh dear or dear oh dear!  I found a response in the paper the following week from someone called Colin Turton of Williams Road in Bosham.  He was, he said largely in agreement with what I had ranted about but he was outraged that I should use the word “fascists” to ridicule this minority of cyclist who plague our precincts and pavements.  He went on to accuse me of “serious and dangerous prejudice”  He refuses the let my statement go unchallenged well he can, for as far as I am concerned that is what they are! I of course concede that my remark was not in any way attributed to the law abiding and responsible cyclists of this land!  Mr Turton, get a life and stop being so precious.

Just for the record and so I can feel better, can I just refer Mr Turton (if he has inadvertently come across my Blog) of my much earlier rant about cyclists and see on context my frustration particularly after an attempt by one idiot on a bike to intimidate me by cycling around me on the pavement.

b***** cyclists!!! August 2009

I rest my case"!

B***** Cyclists!!!

There is not day that passes that I am not forced to step off the pavement to make way for a cyclist who seems hell bent of running me over! Why oh why do they have to do it I ask myself as I watch the latest teenage failed medical experiment hurtle towards me with a face taught with anger and aggression. Having said that the equally berserk Lycra clad so called "sports cyclist" seems also to be hell bent on scaring the living daylights out of any pedestrian who just happens to be in his way (I am not sure that the operation he had on his brain completely worked either). The growing number crazy,ignorant, crazed and plain stupid individuals who have taken to riding on pavements seems to be largely ignored by local authorities despite their attempt to provide swathes of cycling paths which I have yet to see a cyclist actually using! The police, as is often the cry, never seem to be there when the utter fool on a bike (pre-failed medical experiment and probably beyond hope) weaves in and out of the throngs who populate, on foot, yes on foot in the City precinct. I can almost hear the screaming going on his head as he inwardly shouts "get out of my ******* way you people on foot".

I have long wish to be carrying a large box that I have to swap from hand to hand due to its weight so that when one of these buffoons approach I can be deaf, daft and partially sighted and in my plight change hands and thus accidentally allow my large box to knock them flying from their bike! I of course would avoid injury and be the true victim of this needless "RTA", I would sue and claim several hundreds of pounds from the idiot who I would hope bore life long scars on his knees in testament to his anti-social behaviour.

Sadly though I will not have such luck but I do pray that the Police and the Council take more care and make some examples of these cycling thugs and make it a very public event in the process.

So you wonderful cyclists out there, take heed of these key points;

• I may not hear you approaching
• I may not be able to see you approaching
  
• I may be able to see and hear you but I may not be able to move fast enough to get out of your way
• I may have small children who can't get out of the way
• I may push you off your bike
• I may be a psychotic madman (some may already think that anyway)
  
• I may be a police officer
  

Well with all this in mind, happy cycling!